10 random thoughts today
2. Explain to me how after almost 15 years of flying I can�t hold Thanksgiving off and I�m working almost every weekend. I�m freaked out because December is going to be worse and we are going to some parties in December and if I can�t hold the weekends off in November there�s no chance in hell I�ll hold them off in December. Have I said today how much I hate my job? I hate my company and I hate the whole industry.
3. Speaking of hating my company. There�s another flight attendant who blogs. She actually has quite a following. Apparently she posted a picture of herself in part of her uniform. The picture is obviously gone now but she said that there was really nothing showing except for her shirt. Anyway my company somehow found out and they suspended her without pay. For too many reason that really bothers me. That�s why I�m pretty quiet about who I work for. It doesn�t take a brain surgeon to figure it out but now that I know that they my company is truly on a witch hunt, it goes back to it�s best for me to be as anonymous as possible.
4. Yesterday someone said something mean about JAB and his appearance. They said to me in a joking way but it really bothers me because if he knew what this person said it would kill him. I hate when people do that me. I hate it hate it.
5. I read this article and there�s a part of me that�s afraid that they�ll call my Dad back to the air force. I used to joke about it with him but now it looks like it�s happening. I don�t know what I would do if my Dad had to go to Iraq. First of all he�s in shitty health. Second of all there�s a part of him I think would enjoy going so he could relieve his Vietnam glory days.
6. I�m still pissed off that I could not hold Thanksgiving Day off. It�s ruined my day.
7. I slept about 4 hours last night. I want to take a nap today.
8. Someone left me a guestbook message that said that I wrote like a teenage girl; that I was depressing. I think that for the most part that is true. I agree with Leo and that�s part of the reason why I�m really thinking about locking this diary up. I�ve been thinking it about it for a long time really because I use this for me. 90% I write about how I�m feeling inside and honestly I don�t always feel great. I�ve noticed more and more people who are journaling are telling fun and exciting things about themselves. Who their dating, their last sexual experience, whatever, I�m ok with that. I enjoy reading those types of things but that�s not me. Of course there�s also a part of me that thinks if you don�t like what I write then get the hell off my page. But that would probably make me seem more like a teenage girl. So Leo thanks for your advice and I will take it under advisement.
9. I was reading someone else journal today and I realized that friendship really means nothing to most people anymore. There used to be a rule where if your friend liked someone, that person was pretty much hands off. But apparently I�m one of the few people who ever follow that rule. Mainly because I liked someone a lot. Everyone knew I liked him but he didn�t like me. But he did like my friend and the feeling was mutual. We were close friends. He knew how much I liked him but he pretty much told me that he had to �go for it�. They had a hot and heavy couple of months. I was devastated. We frequented the same places so I was always trying to avoid them. Of course as Karma would have it. They had this huge nasty break up that I hear involved the police and some embarrassing moments for me friend. He called me up crying and saying that he was wrong and wanted our friendship back. Back then I was much nicer than I am. I agreed and I became, as I always am, the listener. I listened to all of his stories about what an Ass he was and how he was so controlling. One day I just stop returning his calls. I met JAB a little while after that. I see him every once in a while and we exchange numbers again and again. But I will never forget how he decided to �go for it�.
10. I am so afraid that something�s going to happen. Some event will take place. Something will be said to make George Bush look good and Kerry look bad. This election is so close. Kerry is sounding better and better during his speeches. I just hope he can hold the momentum up.
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