Ramble

Sometimes I wonder. JAB and I had a fight. I don�t even feel like getting into it. I�m just sick of fighting. We go through these stages. I swear it�s like PMS. Sometimes I really see how I have the same relationship that my parents have with each other and in some ways well, most ways, it�s not a good thing. JAB asked me if I�d kept secrets from him. Of course I have but this diary is probably the biggest one. But I have to have it. I realized today that I have very few friends. Not friends who�d I feel comfortable talking about my �martial� problems with. Is that normal. Shouldn�t I have a best friend to be able to complain to? None of my friends from the past know that I�m Gay. That can�t be normal either. God I�m not normal. Imagine that.

I decided against writing the article I wrote about in my last entry. The editor was a little disappointed but the way things happen I did get another writing assignment from a totally different source. I guess the whole thing about a door closing a door opening. Again I won�t be paid and it�s not going to be nearly as controversial but at least I won�t have to walk that inconvenient and sometimes messy moral line that I end up walking.

I broke a promise to myself. I watched American Idol. I didn�t want to. I didn�t really care who won but the local news made such a big deal about it since one of the final two Diana is from Georgia. They are both pretty descent singers.

What I am sad that I missed was George Michael on Oprah. I�ve always been a George Michael fan and will have to get his album when it comes up on ITunes. I see that he�s put on some weight and stopped dyeing his hair which makes him even sexier.

Ok, I bored with myself now so I will close.

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