Update

First of all, thanks to all the people who emailed me this weekend. It really made me feel better. This online community called Diaryland is very reassuring at times. Some of the people who emailed me I didn�t even know read my diary. So thanks again. A quick update on that Situation . JAB has decided to go to counseling. He said that he�s been thinking about it for a long time and he tried to explain the reasons for his anger towards me and towards the world. It makes sense. JAB has put him self in a position where he owes pretty much what he makes. Most of the money goes towards back taxes and back child support. Plus he gives a lot of time to his employee/friends. I totally understand his point of view. If he decides to go to counseling then things will be fine but he has made that promise before. I think that I made it clear that he didn�t have much of a choice if he wanted me in his life. I know it sounds like an ultimatum; probably because it is.

To deal with my depression last night I decided to rent a movie. Now I never rent movies. I don�t even go to the movies very much. I don�t know why but the whole process of waiting in line and then getting the popcorn, etc, etc is just a bit daunting for me so usually I just wait until it�s on cable or I just don�t see it. Well last night I was walking around Blockbuster and my eyes went to Scooby Doo . Why? I don�t know. I wasn�t a huge fan of Scooby Doo when I was growing up and I�m hate Freddie Prinz Jr. .. Not as a person because I don�t know him and I�m sure he�s a swell guy, but I can�t say that I enjoy his acting. But I said what the hell, I�m depressed and maybe I need to find my inner child. Well I watched a little more than half and returned back to Blockbuster. The same woman was there when I returned and she said something like �that was fast� or something. I told her that I hated it, which I did. Nothing held my interest at all. Even Sarah Michelle Gellar who I love as Buffy the Vampire Slayer and enjoyed in Cruel Intentions , bored me which I think has a lot to do with the fact that she�s not a real multi faceted actress. The woman at Blockbuster was so nice she gave me credit. I didn�t know they did that but I was happy that she did. Of course by that point in the night I was really interested in watching anything else so I just went home and took a shower and went to bed.

Today JAB and I went to my parents� house to do more unpacking. I�m starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel. I think we got the most done today than we have so far. I talked to my Mom and Dad and they are really tired of staying in the hotel. My mother is a teacher and she had to stay until the end of the school year. Schools on the west coast end later than schools here; some counties in GA got out before Memorial Day. I would hate that. Anyway, JAB and I both agreed that we need to do as much as possible so when they finally get there they won�t have to do much. That means that we�re going back out there tomorrow. JAB is certainly trying to suck up to me which I can�t say I�m hating.

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